Happy New Year!

Here’s an idea: What better way to kick it off than sending at least one of your potential resolutions right down the shitter? Because if “eat healthier” was on your “2018 To-Do List,” reading this article is likely going to send you into a tailspin of poor dietary choices.

After all, any piece that features a “Krispy Kreme Burger” is bound to trigger a feeding frenzy, right? But, hey, trust us: If you ever have the good fortune of coming across any of these Most Extra Burgers, it’ll be worth dumping your ill-advised New Year’s resolution in order to take a big ‘ol bite.

(Oh, and did you miss our “World’s Most Extra Hot Dogs” article? Click here.)

1. The Ramen Burger

“Most Extra” burgers don’t all have to cost a crap ton. Case in point: Chef Keizo Shimamoto has introduced The Ramen Burger into the world, an $8 concoction that dispenses with traditional buns and replaces them with dried ramen noodles. The ground beef is topped with baby arugula, a “secret” shoyu sauce, and scallions.

2. The Krispy Kreme Burger

Apparently a favorite of singer Luther Vandross, The Krispy Kreme Burger also tells bread to take a hike, replacing each bun with—you guessed it—a fresh Krispy Kreme doughnut. Cheddar cheese and bacon are also commonly featured.

3. The Douche Burger

Image Source: Bloomberg

Got $666 burning a hole in your pocket? Of course you do! So, why not blow it all on a burger? The aptly titled Douche Burger gives you that opportunity. It’s a foie gras-stuffed Kobe beef burger topped with truffles, lobster, caviar, a Kopi Luwak coffee bean-inspired BBQ sauce, and Gruyere cheese. Good Lord.

4. The Absolutely Ridiculous Burger

If The Douche Burger wasn’t absolutely ridiculous enough, here’s something actually named The Absolutely Ridiculous Burger. And this one is “extra” on account of its sheer size. Once winning the world record for the largest commercially available burger, it features 15 pounds of lettuce, 30 pounds each of tomato and bacon, and 36 pounds of cheese. Add in the huge buns and all that beef, and the thing tops three feet in height and weighs a total of 338 pounds. Oh, and P.S.: It’s 540,000 calories.



Yeah. You’re not gonna live to see 2019.

5. Le Burger Extravagant

True to its name, this crazy concoction boasts Wagyu beef that’s been white truffle butter-infused, Chinese Kaluga caviar, cave-aged cheddar (that’s a thing now?), smoked sea salt, a blini (Russian pancake), and a fried quail egg. Oh, and it’s topped off by a friggin’ diamond-encrusted gold toothpick, because why not?